Look at that sophisticated violinist!  We got to hear Megan perform with the junior high orchestra this week.  She did fabulous -- even in spite of a bad case of nerves before we left!  They played four pieces and it really did sound nice.  I was really proud of her.  Like I said, the music was good, but I was more impressed with her guts and stick-to-it-iveness.  She’s been far out of her comfort zone in this orchestra two grade levels beyond her own, but she did it.  She’s decided to call it good enough and not go next semester, and I think that is fine.  I think she is really cool.

Well, more basketball this week.  We had games Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.  There were some wins and some loses.  There were good times and there were bad times.  I don’t know if we were always happy, but we were always busy.  Does that count for something?  I’m sure it must . . .

We have also started our new computer schedule here at our house.  In the absence of mature self-discipline, I have given each child an account on the computer and blocked it for almost every hour of the day.  I have unblocked their account for only the agreed upon interval that is their computer time for the day.  When one child gets closed out, another child’s account becomes available.  Each child has their own password in order to keep siblings out.  Sounds cool, huh?  It is working pretty well.  I think Savannah has logged less computer time and the other girls have logged some more.  But they are pretty nice to each other and often share their computer time with a sister who asks (like Savannah!).

Friday was a pretty traumatic day for me and one I’d like to forget.  But for the sake of a complete record, I will relive it yet again and try not to cry this time.  I decided to clip the nails of our cockatiel, Cornflower.  I cut one of them too close and it wouldn’t stop bleeding.  I tried cornstarch and worrying and finally took him to a vet in Orem which specialized in birds.  She cauterized the nail and stopped the bleeding.  The bird was stressed, but the vet believed he would be fine, and so I believed he would be, too.  Unfortunately, such was not the case.  He never recovered and he died a few hours later.  How is it possible to hurt such a little life so irrevocably and do it so completely by mistake?  So I find myself all these years later again completely derailed by the death of a bird.  Are there bigger traumas in the world?  Absolutely.  Does it make me feel better?  I don’t know why not.  I feel really responsible for the suffering and death of this bird and for the suffering I have thus caused people I also love who loved the bird.  The people I love have only proved they love me more by their concern for me over their concern for their own loss.  I have been really touched by that.  Even Megan, who claimed the bird as her own, has been more anxious for me, than for herself.  I am truly blessed to be surrounded by such people! Now, I will continue to work on forgiving myself.